Come and Gone
I should be sleeping, because even though I'm not going to work tomorrow, I still need to go to the airport early for my trip to Canada! Vancouver! To see the kids. And by the kids I mean my brother and sis-in-law. I'm excited.
But before I go to sleep, I feel like I should update briefly about the "Letter to Myself at 30" that I wrote from my 20-year-old self.
Let's just say it wasn't as bad as I thought. I thought it was going to be full of wishes I'd made at 20 that I'd hoped would be true at 30, and aren't. But no. I basically just had a lot of questions.
Here's an excerpt:
"What kind of music, clothes, etc. are in now? Right now the music is kind of pop alternative and people like to wear work shirts w/other people's names (just one trend of many). 70s styles are in. Any new words? [Um. Yes. Google. Facebook. iPod. What else? There must be tons.] What was the year 2000 like? [Mostly disappointing.] Right now that seems spooky. And you get to P.E.I.? [I like this question, because YES! I did. With the cousins, just like we'd planned.]
I had questions about my brother . . . I forgot how much I didn't like him when he was 17 and I was 20. Looking back now, I think we were just really, really different and I didn't understand anything that was going on his life, nor was I particularly open to hearing about it. And I think he was kind of obnoxious. But we are both different, and we've moved closer together, and I think it's good.
Another excerpt:
"I feel like I should say something edifying--a revelation about this time, so at 30 you can look back and learn from this. But what? Well, what have I learned since I was 10? Depression is temporary. Friends are important, I am a loyal person, etc. What have you learned between 20 and 30. Hopefully something."
Yeah, hopefully. Geez, 20 year old me didn't have a lot of faith. I've learned more in the last decade than in any previous, so that's good. What have I learned? It can pretty much be summed up with "nothing's as big of a deal as you think it is."
And finally:
"All I have is questions. I feel as though I'm writing to a different person, and in a way I am. Thirty is different than 20. But how am I the same? What has carried over from 10 to 20 to 30. Anything? Maybe by 30 you will know."
Do I know? I know MORE. But maybe that's the whole point of this aging thing. Maybe uncovering "me" is an ongoing process that's never going to be finished. It's all in the journey and that sort of thing.
And if you look at "growing up" as slowly uncovering your soul--whatever it is that makes YOU, you--then it's kind of interesting adventure.
And now it's time for me to quit muddling around in philosophical musings and go to bed.
But before I go to sleep, I feel like I should update briefly about the "Letter to Myself at 30" that I wrote from my 20-year-old self.
Let's just say it wasn't as bad as I thought. I thought it was going to be full of wishes I'd made at 20 that I'd hoped would be true at 30, and aren't. But no. I basically just had a lot of questions.
Here's an excerpt:
"What kind of music, clothes, etc. are in now? Right now the music is kind of pop alternative and people like to wear work shirts w/other people's names (just one trend of many). 70s styles are in. Any new words? [Um. Yes. Google. Facebook. iPod. What else? There must be tons.] What was the year 2000 like? [Mostly disappointing.] Right now that seems spooky. And you get to P.E.I.? [I like this question, because YES! I did. With the cousins, just like we'd planned.]
I had questions about my brother . . . I forgot how much I didn't like him when he was 17 and I was 20. Looking back now, I think we were just really, really different and I didn't understand anything that was going on his life, nor was I particularly open to hearing about it. And I think he was kind of obnoxious. But we are both different, and we've moved closer together, and I think it's good.
Another excerpt:
"I feel like I should say something edifying--a revelation about this time, so at 30 you can look back and learn from this. But what? Well, what have I learned since I was 10? Depression is temporary. Friends are important, I am a loyal person, etc. What have you learned between 20 and 30. Hopefully something."
Yeah, hopefully. Geez, 20 year old me didn't have a lot of faith. I've learned more in the last decade than in any previous, so that's good. What have I learned? It can pretty much be summed up with "nothing's as big of a deal as you think it is."
And finally:
"All I have is questions. I feel as though I'm writing to a different person, and in a way I am. Thirty is different than 20. But how am I the same? What has carried over from 10 to 20 to 30. Anything? Maybe by 30 you will know."
Do I know? I know MORE. But maybe that's the whole point of this aging thing. Maybe uncovering "me" is an ongoing process that's never going to be finished. It's all in the journey and that sort of thing.
And if you look at "growing up" as slowly uncovering your soul--whatever it is that makes YOU, you--then it's kind of interesting adventure.
And now it's time for me to quit muddling around in philosophical musings and go to bed.
Labels: Big Questions, Good Times, Time Flies
posted by Melanie at 12:45 AM
