We both know I'm not what you need
Dear Old Navy:
Honestly, we've had a good relationship, right? Ever since I first met you, in the Buffalo Galleria in 1997, I've liked being with you. Sure we've had our ups and downs, there have been times when you haven't been there for me in ways I would've liked, but we've always made it work.
But tonight, for the first time, you really disappointed me. Skinny jeans? Yeah, I understand. You've got an image to uphold, you've got to be trendy. But I don't like seeing them. Ugly shirts, lots of wrinkled things.
But the clincher: the tights. I need your black tights. And tonight, you couldn't give those to me. You only had footless tights. Footless. FOOTLESS. I got over those in 7th grade. I really need more from you, Old Navy. I'm a grownup now.
And so, while I'll see you around for the occasional t-shirt, I think we probably need to end this. We obviously want different things . . . I'm ready to move on.
-Me
Honestly, we've had a good relationship, right? Ever since I first met you, in the Buffalo Galleria in 1997, I've liked being with you. Sure we've had our ups and downs, there have been times when you haven't been there for me in ways I would've liked, but we've always made it work.
But tonight, for the first time, you really disappointed me. Skinny jeans? Yeah, I understand. You've got an image to uphold, you've got to be trendy. But I don't like seeing them. Ugly shirts, lots of wrinkled things.
But the clincher: the tights. I need your black tights. And tonight, you couldn't give those to me. You only had footless tights. Footless. FOOTLESS. I got over those in 7th grade. I really need more from you, Old Navy. I'm a grownup now.
And so, while I'll see you around for the occasional t-shirt, I think we probably need to end this. We obviously want different things . . . I'm ready to move on.
-Me
posted by Melanie at 10:40 PM
