Hateration

Olive Garden commercials. Seriously.

The latest:

Suburban white dad to attractive young waitress: What is the endless pasta bowl?

AYW explains.

Suburban white mom: That will make him endlessly happy.

Everyone chuckles at this display of wit.

[Break for shilling of product.]

Precocious suburban white son: I wish we could have endless allowance at home.

Parents and son share a laugh over this wacky notion.

Now I realize Olive Garden is the symbol of all that is suburban and generic, but who came up with these things? I can’t figure out if a bunch of hipster ad guys in a room decided that they were going to try to market to what they thought suburban Olive Garden-goers would like, or they just decided to be ironic, or if these ads are meant to be taken seriously. And if they are meant to be taken seriously, who wrote them?

P.S. I really also hate the one with that guy who sees a platter of pasta going by and declares he’s discovered his new “usual” (or something like that) and all his friends laugh at how crazy he is.