You oughta know
I have a bulletin board in my kitchen that’s full of wedding invitations and Save-the-Date cards. Just the other day I tacked up the first baby shower invite. I’ve gotten shower invites before, of course, but this is the first shower invite that made it to the board--and I have a feeling there will be a lot more to come.
I’ve been thinking a lot about babies lately. Probably because by the end of the year my family will have two new ones, who I fully intend to treat as my nephew (and as yet to be discovered) nephew or niece. (I vote niece!) Of course, neither of these kids will be actual nieces or nephews, but hey, I can pretend. Any actual nieces or nephews I ever get will probably grow up as Canadians.
Anyway, I’m thinking about it because here I am, going about my life, understanding so much at 30 about where I fit and what life is like in this world right now. There’s just so much information and context and what-have-you, and these kids will be born without any of it. And I know from experience that hearing your parents talk about the past is fun and good, but it doesn’t actually help you “get it.” I don’t know what the world was like when Beatles songs were being played on the radio for the first time, or when Lancaster was basically just a farm community with a city at its center. I don’t know what my parents were like when they were my age or what they talked about with their friends. I don't know what the extended family looked or sounded like before I was old enough to remember it.
I suppose this is just a factor of being born when you are, and maybe it’s nice that new children aren’t weighted down with the baggage of an 80-year-old woman, moaning about how things used to be. But I’m a context girl. When I discovered my strengths, context was in my top five. And since I feel like you can understand the present so much better when you understand the past, I want to give these new children some kind of information that will help them be wise from the beginning. To understand what’s happening now, while they’re not even really in the world. Here’s what came before you: this is why things are the way they are.
But it’s not possible for me to pass my so-called life of acquired wisdom on to anyone, let alone two babies who won’t be interested for a long time, if ever. So they’ll have to figure it out for themselves (mostly) and the rest of us will just be here in case they ever want to know.
I’ve been thinking a lot about babies lately. Probably because by the end of the year my family will have two new ones, who I fully intend to treat as my nephew (and as yet to be discovered) nephew or niece. (I vote niece!) Of course, neither of these kids will be actual nieces or nephews, but hey, I can pretend. Any actual nieces or nephews I ever get will probably grow up as Canadians.
Anyway, I’m thinking about it because here I am, going about my life, understanding so much at 30 about where I fit and what life is like in this world right now. There’s just so much information and context and what-have-you, and these kids will be born without any of it. And I know from experience that hearing your parents talk about the past is fun and good, but it doesn’t actually help you “get it.” I don’t know what the world was like when Beatles songs were being played on the radio for the first time, or when Lancaster was basically just a farm community with a city at its center. I don’t know what my parents were like when they were my age or what they talked about with their friends. I don't know what the extended family looked or sounded like before I was old enough to remember it.
I suppose this is just a factor of being born when you are, and maybe it’s nice that new children aren’t weighted down with the baggage of an 80-year-old woman, moaning about how things used to be. But I’m a context girl. When I discovered my strengths, context was in my top five. And since I feel like you can understand the present so much better when you understand the past, I want to give these new children some kind of information that will help them be wise from the beginning. To understand what’s happening now, while they’re not even really in the world. Here’s what came before you: this is why things are the way they are.
But it’s not possible for me to pass my so-called life of acquired wisdom on to anyone, let alone two babies who won’t be interested for a long time, if ever. So they’ll have to figure it out for themselves (mostly) and the rest of us will just be here in case they ever want to know.
Labels: Big Questions, Family, Unsolicited Advice
posted by Melanie at 12:23 PM
